Kitchen Sink Edition

Whew, I’ve been so busy I forgot to send off rent, but that may have been wishful thinking.

I’m back to the facial hair on account of some silly contest, but it doesn’t cost me anything, and who knows, with the wide space that I can’t find the name of between the bottom of my nose and top of my lip, I may open up a bottle of whup-ass on the testosterone-filled punks I’m up against. From clean shaven on Feb 1 to hirsute as possible on April 13 is the time span. There just better be a ‘stache puller judge there to make sure no under-employed make-up artists have applied Miracle Grow, if you know what I mean. And from the Commodore: “Are you going to use a grow light?” Shh! I was writing/thinking/researching on a Hungarian topic when I saw the ad about the contest, sponsored by that nation’s reaching for the hipsters tourist board, so I was inspired. Now, which is nicer, Buda or Pest?

I finished Bolano’s 2666, and that’s good enough reason to take a break. Holy-moly. A hell of a novel, in every sense. Highly recommended, that is if you’re not a sucker for Disney crap.

I love it when someone adorable calls me “Mr. Smarty Pants.”

I was alerted to the artist Zina Saunders’ Overlooked New Yorkers project and saw pigeon fanciers, fishermen, kite fliers, mushroom hunters and many others, but no birders. No birders! Can you believe that? We are thousands strong in this town. Henry Hank Paulson is one of us! BTW, isn’t he in jail yet? Ah, yes, the birdman of Ossining. (At brunch last Sunday, I was amusing or horrifying the guests with the suggestion that a couple of megabankers should be lined up against the Battery and shot; I think it would be good for our morale.) Surely you’ve met some of the asocial loners who haunt the woods and push the little ones out of the way to see the white winged crossbills? Not that I’m anything much like that! Ahem. Anyway, I sent her an email and noted that the Brooklyn Bird Club is 100 years old this year. Well, you know what Groucho said about clubs. Anyway, she’s going to paint and interview me as the first in a series of bin-packing, hawk-eyed, keep watching the sky types....

I am very excited by this Film Forum series Breadlines and Champagne. Screwballs, social consciousness, pre-Code. Motor-mouthed Lee Tracy! Women in slinky art deco dresses! Be still my beating heart!